As you embark on this new journey of going on your own, you most likely have experienced the following like I did.
1. You have been at it for more than a few months now, operating as an owner. Still working for free, burning through your savings, and your bank account is rapidly depleting.
2. You have no choice but to do things out of your comfort zone, or things you don’t enjoy. Like dealing with lawyers, signing up for Instagram, or learn to like old fashioned drinks just because your potential client are in the bar business.
3. You have offered jobs to people that pay a hell lot more than you (well, since you make $0 now, that kid selling lemonade will be making more)
4. You felt like you are totally going backwards, and wondered if you should just go back to finding a job
On the onset, it felt like the whole idea of startup is taking advantage of you. My staff and potential hires are offered WAY more pay then I do. I just offered a dude $160K with 5% equity while hoping to god that he is worth it. That's a salary I never would have dreamt of making. Instead, I inherited half a million dollar business loan to pay off shit like desks and computers. Which means if and when there is profit, it goes towards paying the loan before I can even touch any rewards.
Ok fine, I told myself I am not in it for the money, like most entrepreneur would have told you. But starting a business got to be about making money at some point! Otherwise what else is in it for me? Follow my passion, then starve to death and ride a unicorn through rainbow while I am at it?!
I started to doubt if I have made the right decision. I started to doubt if my role can be done by another person. I started to doubt whether I should've gone in with a high salary with less equity to get really comfortable. At the end of the day, it comes down to what do I want to become? How do I want to make an impact? And most importantly how far would I go and is this worth it?
My gut tells me I am uncomfortable because I can't quite picture the end results. My heart tells me just to hang on a little longer.
My uneasiness probably comes from comparing my status with others. It comes from my ego not 100% ok with my staff making more money than I am. It also comes from that things are moving a little slower than I thought and I am losing patience. I really just need to SUCK. IT. UP.
But I do give myself props for being a true entrepreneur and acknowledged that not everyone can take this risk and make this bold move. I did it, cold turkey style. For that, I take full pride. 20 years from now, I have a story to tell, failure or success. THAT, to me, is what "Legacy" is about.
Legacy is not inherited. Legacy requires a great deal of courage, and navigating through difficulties. Legacy means taking risk and shaping a path that people will admire but didn't have courage to do themselves. Legacy means taking a deep breath, hang tight, and break through.
I am not settling for anything less than a Legacy. And with that, I am going to pad myself in the back and go back to my zero paid job.